Why Communication Fails

Transmission is not communication

Communication has occurred when the other person understands what was meant, not when the message was sent. Most communication failure consists of a sender who considers the matter dealt with and a receiver who understood something different or nothing at all.

Where it breaks down

• The curse of knowledge. Once you understand something, you cannot easily imagine not understanding it. Explanations that seem clear to the expert are incomprehensible to the newcomer, and the expert cannot see why.
• Assumed context. The sender has the background; the receiver has a fragment. Information obvious to one is missing from the other.
• Jargon and abbreviation, which excludes people who will not admit they do not understand.
• Too much — the important point buried among the rest.
• The wrong channel — a difficult message by email, a routine update in a meeting.
• Interference — the receiver's assumptions, mood, workload and relationship with the sender all shape what is heard.
• No confirmation. The sender does not check whether the message landed.

Principles that work

• Start from the receiver. What do they already know, what do they care about, what do they need to do? Communication designed from the sender's convenience fails predictably.
• Lead with the point. Say the conclusion first, then the reasoning. Building up to the point means many people never reach it.
• Be specific. Concrete beats abstract. "Reduce reporting from two days to two hours" communicates; "improve efficiency" does not.
• Say less. Most communication is improved substantially by removing half of it. A message with one point is remembered; one with seven is not.
• Explain why. People who understand the reasoning can adapt; people given only instructions cannot, and they resist more.
• Repeat. A message heard once is largely not retained. Leaders consistently underestimate the repetition required, and stop roughly when people are starting to hear it.
• Check understanding — not "does that make sense?", which invites a polite yes, but asking the person to say what they will do.

Choosing the channel

Match richness to difficulty. Complex, sensitive, emotional or contentious matters require conversation, where tone and reaction are visible and questions can be answered. Routine information suits writing, which persists and can be referred back to.

The common error is using writing to avoid a difficult conversation. A message that is hard to deliver in person will be received worse in writing, and the choice of channel is itself read as a statement.

Non-verbal signals

Tone, expression, posture and attention carry a large share of the meaning, and where they contradict the words, people believe the non-verbal. A leader saying the right thing while visibly impatient communicates the impatience.